Forums / Miscellaneous Discussions / US Election 08' -Vote Cthulhu!

US Election 08' -Vote Cthulhu!
00:49:58 Sep 8th 07 - Mr. Messiah:

Are you tired of partisan rhetoric and lying, devious executives who can't keep true to what they claimed they would do on the campaign trail?

Then come 2008, vote for the one candidate who doesn't flip-flop: The Lord of the Abyss, King of Despair and Master of Carnage, Great Cthulhu. Cthulhu has one goal: the complete destruction of all existence, and you can be sure he won't cut-and-run until nothing is left. Mission accomplished.

Cthulhu supports compromise on a variety of issues.

Abortion? To please the right, Cthulhu supports the nation-wide banning of abortion. However, for those who want their right to choose, a government initiative will be set up: In the place of an abortion Cthulhu will eat your unborn baby. (Note: Baby consumption may be mandatory)

For the war in Iraq? Against it? Cthulhu will lash out with his infinite tendrils and eradicate all life in the Middle-East. The war on terror is won, and we get to bring our troops back home (those that escape before said eradication).

All in all, you can't afford not to vote for Cthulhu. Because if you don't, you'll be the first to be fed to him once he takes power.

Just kidding! We'll all be first.

00:53:51 Sep 8th 07 - Mr. Messiah:

Vote for Cthluhu in the presidential election of 2008.!
Cthulhu's campaign platform:

  • Tough on poverty
  • Tough on crime
  • No new taxes
  • Pro-literacy
  • Supports scholarly inquiry in those who ask for help
  • pro death sentence (He'll eat them)
  • pro *beep* marraige for the left and for the right he'll eat them (but then he'd do that anyway)
  • tough on immigration (eats anyone who crosses the line, or doesnt cross... either way)
  • Supports federal dollars (or gold bullion) for "faith- based" (or is that sacrifice-based?) organizations
  • Nuclear weapons? Under the Great Cthulhu we will need no weapons. He will devour those who oppose us, before he eats us (not necessarily in that order)
  • He is an environmentalist (especially with matters of oceanic pollution control)

I also hear that he's going to reform the No Child Left Behind Act by eating all of the children.

05:12:56 Sep 8th 07 - Mr. Blue Dog Anchorite:

All hail the mighty Cthulhu!

14:42:35 Sep 8th 07 - Mr. Prince of Darkness:

fuke him

15:34:15 Sep 8th 07 - Sir Jack Frost:

lol, I'm Not American !!!!

YAHOO !!!!

03:03:48 Sep 9th 07 - Sir Hephaestus:

Can't you grow a sense of humor, Prince?

10:59:06 Sep 9th 07 - Mr. Dreadii:

ow you mean like.
haha 1 million iraqi civilians dead LOL?? killing more is so funny???

11:31:44 Sep 9th 07 - Mr. Messiah:

This isnt meant to be fun! Cthulhu has one goal: the complete destruction of all existence, and you can be sure he won't cut-and-run until nothing is left. Mission accomplished.

14:01:21 Sep 9th 07 - Mr. Prince of Darkness:

i though messiah is makin advertising so i said , wtf , they will elect anther stupid to rule the world

16:14:34 Sep 9th 07 - Duke Gaius Septim II: time you have a thought, let it go...


16:19:17 Sep 9th 07 - Sir Jack Frost:

i actually agree with prince, Usa is the most powerful nation in the world, it is also the most ignorent nation in the world, a small % of idoits decide who becomes the next ruler of the world ?

All i can say is hurry up China.

16:31:43 Sep 9th 07 - Mr. Messiah:

Ever heard of satire?

16:36:43 Sep 9th 07 - Sir Jack Frost:

yes, but you can hardley call it that Clinton, Regon & now Bush.

See a patteren ?

I'm not American, but all i can say is, UP HILLARY CLINTON !!!

20:52:01 Sep 9th 07 - Sir Hephaestus:

Satire is wasted on the stupid.

Frost, if you think America is ignorant, then how you do you feel about Prince assuming that this is an actual America presidential candidate?  This just goes to show he isn't knowledge about American politics yet still feels he has the right to judge it.  Just like many, many, many others in this world.

01:02:23 Sep 10th 07 - Duke Ranfaf:

Wait he thought that it was a real canidate? Dam he's dumber then I thought he was........

19:51:04 Sep 10th 07 - Sir Jack Frost:

lol, i'm not American.

But tell me this, who was the running canidates for the Irish election ?

19:57:08 Sep 10th 07 - Sir Hephaestus:

I don't know, but neither am I saying "fuke Ireland's candidates!" or any other crap like that, because I admit I don't know and am thus not going to try and judge.

20:09:47 Sep 10th 07 - Sir Jack Frost:

thank you...

I am not trying to put down all of America (i know some very smart Americans),

I just think your voting system isn't as fair as it could be...

20:10:49 Sep 10th 07 - Sir Fizban:

It's clear you're not an American. It's also clear you don't have a grasp on two things called 'Spelling' and 'Grammar'. I thought they knew how to speak and write English in Ireland. *Smacks around Jack with the 'Trout of Spelling and Grammar'*

As for Ireland itself. Who cares who is running? So long as you keep up your supply of beer, corned beef and cabbage and maintain the Blarny Stone the world will be happy. ;-).

20:15:38 Sep 10th 07 - Sir Jack Frost:

Corned beef ?

lol, we ship out more Computers than corned beef !

P.s whats wrong with my grammer ?

20:16:33 Sep 10th 07 - Mr. Erunion Telcontar:

Prince of Darkness thought this was about a real candidate? Wow.

Please, oh mighty ZeTa, don't allow him to play this game, it is rumoured stupidity is infectious! AHHHHHH!!!!

20:17:39 Sep 10th 07 - Ms. Natalia:

Your grammar is like mine only, i know how to spell grammAR. Also i'm dyslexic so your spelling and grammar is ju*beep*nny!

20:18:13 Sep 10th 07 - Sir Fizban:

Oi. If I went through your posts for typos and error mistakes, I'd have a freakin' heart attack.

So I'll get back to work. lol

20:18:49 Sep 10th 07 - Sir Jack Frost:

ok one letter ?

Your going to hate me for ONE letter ?

20:20:12 Sep 10th 07 - Ms. Natalia:

fizban! you can't talk, you still need to do werewolf!, we are about to revolt!

20:26:24 Sep 10th 07 - Sir Fizban:

You already are revolting. ;-)

I'll do it when I get home. I'm tearing stuff up with a forklift right now. lol

20:38:51 Sep 10th 07 - Ms. Natalia:

Thats not what the guys who have seen my new pics have said.

20:57:23 Sep 10th 07 - Mr. Henri Cazeux:

Messiah, I are seen you other postings and you words in zeon holy book, did you rite them all by you? 

21:20:58 Sep 10th 07 - Mr. Prince of Darkness:

he is the 5th writer of bible , omg , the number is increasing .

now you need to make ther is 4 gods , i sugest

the father , the son , the grand , the holy spirit , you know natural balance

21:22:09 Sep 10th 07 - Mr. Prince of Darkness:

he will take the grand story from roleplaying stories , what ? it's a nice idea

21:32:32 Sep 10th 07 - Mr. Henri Cazeux:

wow, so you did write the words, messiah.  i think you should see a metal-brain doctor quickly, or cease intakeing of halleucinogens drugs.

21:33:28 Sep 10th 07 - Mr. Prince of Darkness:

man i thought it's regular to write anther bible , i mean who cares from christions

we can't change an apstrofe in koran

21:56:59 Sep 10th 07 - Mr. Soccermage:

wow, i have no idea what was just said in the above few posts. anyway, i just have to tell messiah, as a full hearted supporter, I will be voting for Cthulhu! Long live the hungry beast!

22:30:08 Sep 10th 07 - Mr. Erunion Telcontar:

No... It is most emphatically not OK to write another bible...... Nor change the meaning of what is already there...

22:42:30 Sep 10th 07 - Mr. Henri Cazeux:

Its not okay to rite VU holy book at all, if yourite one, you r freak sorry, but you get too involve in game and its a wierdness thing and no girls to you lolol.

00:21:20 Sep 11th 07 - Sir Hephaestus:

Messiah is the ladies' man!  His mind is always off with them, that's why he has to write the weird stuff here.

" i think you should see a metal-brain doctor "

Are you suggesting Messiah is an android???  That would explain a lot actually...


What are you talking about?

00:22:50 Sep 11th 07 - Sir Fizban:

Don't worry Heph, it's just the sacrifices for our next president coming out of the woodwork.

03:57:45 Sep 11th 07 - Mr. Henri Cazeux:

Hehe apoligizes for confuse you all, i mean to say <<mental>> lol, me pardonner

05:23:00 Sep 11th 07 - Sir Hephaestus:

No worries, we knew what you meant.

00:06:37 Sep 12th 07 - Mr. Messiah:

<<uh oh, they are on to me>>

00:32:09 Sep 12th 07 - Mr. Squiddy:

What an intelligent thread ^.^

14:49:20 Sep 12th 07 - Sir Fizban:

Messiah. Where does Cthulhu stand on Russia's increasing show of military muscle and what would he tell Putin when he becomes Pres in '09?

16:08:45 Sep 12th 07 - Mr. Messiah:

He would just invite Putin to to camp David where he would devour him. Then he would subjugate Russia with his everlasting omnipotence before annihilating entire Asia, Europe and the rest of the world.

16:24:25 Sep 12th 07 - Mr. Mushashi:

so ... that would be a good thing i geuss?  what if he gets gass? it's not all very healthy ... my dietist would turn in his grave :-p

16:40:55 Sep 12th 07 - Mr. Kayn:

US Election 08

No one cares. You actually believe your vote counts?

You replace one *beep* with another...

17:59:23 Sep 12th 07 - Sir Hephaestus:

/\ don't you hate these kind of people who don't actully read the thread, only it's title?

18:05:51 Sep 12th 07 - Mr. Dreadii:

quote : Joseph Stalin.
It is enough that the people know there was an election. The people who cast the votes decide nothing. The people who count the votes decide everything. (bush's cousin :p)

18:09:41 Sep 12th 07 - Mr. Dreadii:

note imagine 50 years ago in a country now 20 years gone people where actually told the truth. Reality is relitive. Things could be anything should you dare want it :D.

00:16:56 Sep 13th 07 - Sir Hephaestus:

Been reading 1984? :D

04:31:23 Sep 13th 07 - Mr. Soccermage:

good book! anyway, the us election is important, as is any country's elections. we all affect each other, so u may want to rethink that.

if hillary wins, im going to become an assassin.

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