Forums / Roleplaying / Ye Olde Taverne

(resounding silence)

"Errrrr, barkeep, get Seloc your finest ale And we should have a resteraunt put in here..Idea!"

*Tiber runs to his footlocker and notices a pair of boots covered in brown. Tiber throws the shoes over his shoulder (hitting Master in the nose) and continues rummaging in his footlocker

"AHA"

*Tiber pulls out a small orb and throws it at the wall, suddenly a door appears there and Tiber walks in and out of it.

"Yay, I just built a kitchen!"

*Tiber puts up a counter and hangs a sign over it saying Ye Olde Resteraunte.

"Ye Olde Resteraunte is open for business!"

*Grabs the menus and rips them into little pieces*

"This is a taverne, if you want food then either go home or go to the nearest McDonalds. We are having no such restaurant in the Olde Taverne. Senturu would not want it......"

*Looks around wondering where all of the old customers went.*

"Hmmmm......maybe they left when Senturu did because they knew this place would fall apart without him......"

*Walks off mumbling to himself and thinking*

*Tiber uses the orb to store the kitchen

"Who needs food when you have beer anyways, I'll take an ale."

*Tiber slaps Master again

"You'll be out cold until I say you can wake up dammit!"

*Tiber backhand slaps master, knocking him out cold. Tiber then draws a goatee, glasses, a unibrow, and a pair of buckteeth on Master.

"Ragnarr, when are you going to beat him?"

* jusanius looks up frightened and makes a run for it then ducks under one of the tables*

quite a beating master

*master steal ragnarrs wisky and sword then goes and shares them with justanius

 "Don't worry Ragnarr he's always looked like that"

"Getting a bit out of hand here no isn't it..."
*Tiber pulls out his magical or with a dial on it. One end says peace, the other says war, he turns the dial all the way to peace. Suddenly Ragnarr, Seloc, Goldmeister, and all off the other patrons are sitting around the fireplace sipping tea.

"Now, this just plain stinks."

*Tiber turns it to where it was before and sits down.

"I won't"

*Tiber reaches for the dial...

*Tiber stops reaching for the dial and walks over to Defensive. Tiber slaps him across the face and throws him in the fireplace. Tiber returns to his drink and forgets about the orb.

*Hits his mug on the bar*

"No really, where the hell is the barkeep? Haven't seen him for a long time."

"I wonder....."

*Seloc reaches for the dial, switches it all the way to war. Suddenly there all in a barren waste land, with lava crackes and everything, each of them is holding the weapon of choice. He turns the dial back and suddenly there all round the fire again.*

 "Cool, peace, war, peace, war, peace, war, peace etc"

defensive has some fun with tibers personal effecs while he is sleeping like shoving all tibers clothes in selocs clothes so now tibers looks and smells like a walking *beep*

*Tiber starts sleepslapping Defensive

*Tiber uses Phoenix down on himself (Thanks for the idea Seloc) and continues sleeping

*Tiber wakes up and notices he is covered in dry poop.

"This smells like Defensive's work"

*Tiber walks over to Seloc (Whom is still fiddling with the Orb of Peace and War) and snatches it from him.

"No playing with stuff from my footlocker."

*Tiber places his orb into the footlocker and gets into different clothes, throwing the dirty ones out the window. He then walks over to Goldmeister, grabs his Single-shot pistol, and shoots Defensive in the chest.

"Perfect, sorry about the only bullet you had Goldmeister, but I have something else for you"

*Tiber grabs a cutlass from his footlocker, hands it to golmeister, and takes his seat at the bar.

"I wonder when I'm going to get that beer I ordered..."

*Seloc having lost his orb of peace and war is now increadibly bored, he goes and sits in the corner of the room (a dark corner) and starts twidalling his thumbs thinking.....................*

"Ouch"

*Tiber turns around and sees Defensive

"Who would waste beer by shoving it up my *beep* hole...now your going to die."

*Tiber jabs his hand into Defensive's stomache and rips out his intestines and wraps them around his neck, strangling him with them...after Defensive dies Tiber walks over to his footlocker and cleans his hands in his prota-sink. He then goes over to the bar and continues waiting for his drink.

"That is the punishment for wasting beer..."

umm.... what happned to Sentru and Firendash? have they left?

*Tiber gets up, walks to the corner of the room, lays down, and starts sleeping...

*Seloc impails Defensive on a giant spike in the center of the room.*

 "Just making sure he really is dead........."

*Tiber wakes up and looks at Defensive

"Best art I've seen in a long time."

*Tiber puts tape on defensive's mouth

*Tiber laughs and pours lemon juice and salt in the hole

*Tiber continues pouring lemon juice, then remember that he has acid in his Footlocker, he walks over to his footlocker, grabs the acid, comes back, and pours it all over Defensive's hands.

"MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"