Forums / Roleplaying / Ye Olde Taverne

"so do i.. what am i agreeing with?"

"Not again......"

"Scientist why do you need a wallet you have those breifcase of yours...."

*Seloc points at the breifcases Senturu was trying to smuggle out the door.*

*Gaius looks at Senturu

"Scientist, he did it again..."

*Scientist looks round at Senturu who is trying to prise his hand off of the spikes on the briefcase*

"You should know by now you're not getting into one of them....."

*Scientist raises his hand and Senturu and wiggles his fingers. The spikes disappear and Senturu is suddenly turned into a donkey. The briefcase slowly hovers back over to Scientist who is still sat wobbly on the barstool*

"Huh, that wasn't supposed to happen, one minute."

*Scientist wiggles his fingers again and Senturu starts turning into all kinds of animals. Scientist sighs in boredom. As he raises his hand this time, Senturu is lifted into the air and spun round, a light consumes him as he is continually spinning in some kind of vortex and when everything stops, Senturu is standing in front of everyone with a rather confused look on his face.*

"Right, now remind me not to drink and cast anymore, almost lost my drink vender......I'll have another one over here"

*Scientist turns and his head slams down onto the bar*

*Seloc wiggles his fingure at Senturu..........nothing happened.*

"Hmmm........must be something in the drink."

*The briefcase in Senturus hands suddenly hovers back across the floor to Scientist. Who is stil slightly unconscious on the barstool. A lightning bolt flies out of the briefcase and into Senturus leg, causing him to have a gaping hole appear as the intensified electricity goes straight through his leg*

*Septim licks up the beer and gets up

"Seeing as Senturu is leaving for a long time. I want to host a party!"

*Septim hangs up several streamers and a sign saying "GOODBYE SENTURU" on it. He then walks up to Senturu.

"So, there are a few matters to settle before you leave, who will be barkeep while you are gone?"

"YES!!!!"

*Runs over to the restroom closes the door and puts up police tape across it with a big no entry sign stuck on the door. Inside lots of machinery can be heard and lots and lots of loud noises. About 10 minutes later Scientist walks out looking exhausted but quite pleased with himself. He waves his hand at the wooden door and it flies off of it hinges and out of the Taverne. In its place is a big steel door with some kind of scanner on it*

"I'll have a drink Senturu, make it a large one"

*Scientist sits down tiredly*

*pours Sceintist a large drink*

well i see you got your work cut out for you

*runs outside and points to the "garde" Ragnarr is sitting on*

thats the compost pile dude....thats where we put our waste from the bathroom....

*Septim has to pee so he walks over to the bathroom and places his hand on the scanner, a voice calls out.

"Name and business?"

"I gotta pee!"

"Access denied!"

*A small laser shoots out at Septim and Septim narrowly avoids it. Septim walks outside and walks back in.

"Much better!"

*Scientist walks over to the restroom and places his hand on the scanner then places his eye in towards the retinal scanner. The door whirrs a little and then opens with a computerised voice saying "Welcome Scientist". Scientist walks in and the door slams shut quite abruptly behind him. Inside more noise can be heard inside. A few moments later Scientist emerges and the door shuts and the same voice says "Thank you Scientist.".*

"Right my room is installed, Senturu, you are the only other person who can go in, but only when I'm in there to deliver drinks. Anyone else will not get past my security door and the traps......"

*Scientist sits at a barstool and drinks his drink*

*Looks over at Septim who is behind the bar pouring out drinks*

"I think I would rather just come out here and get my drinks then, it took me alot of effort to program Senturus mugshot into that doors computer, can't be bothered to do it again, either that or knock and I'll come and collect them from the door......."

*finishes his drink and signals for another*

*decides that septims spamms too much*

*Septim laughs as Bjs is suddenly shot by a large anti-intruder laser cannon controlled by Scientist's wrist watch.

*Septim narrowly avoids the laser.

"No more drinks for Scientist. He is gettin' too drunk to invent things correctly!"

[[OOC: It's not right to control people like that!]]

*Septim stabs a man in a white lab coat who is A Scientist but not THE Scientist. Septim then sits down at the bar.

*a guard walks in and puts yellow 'crime scene' tape all over the dead scientist*
"every body must stay at least five meters away from the body by order of the king!"

*the guard becomes enraged at septim and tries to stab him, but misses. The guard's eyes become red and he screams: "ALKARID NORFARILN!!!" and then turns into a gigantic demon obsessed with destroying the world*

*bjs looks at septim*
"nice work"

*the guard Is momentarily stunned and then revives in a nearby town...

4 weeks later

*A town is destroyed*

*looks at septim*
"nice going"

*Ragnarr goes to the bar and takes another bottle of whisky.*
"So, how much did I owe you,....?"
*Places two gold coins and three silver ones in front of Septim.*
"I believe I broke a thing or two,..."
"Anyway, I hope I'll come back soon."
"Farewell, lads."
*Ragnarr leaves the tavern.*

*looks up*

"why is there no ceiling on this place? i think it makes it colder..."

*walks back into the bar looking normal as if nothing had happened*

"why do you blame me for killing that scientist? just because he did experiments on me and gave me superpowers doesn't mean i want to kill him!"
*points across the room towards Septim"
"he did it!"
*then with the superpowers he has makes scientists briefcase float back into the tavern*
"yes i know i stole it... i found the butterfly inside too. but Seloc shot it with an arrow"
*glares at seloc*
"i replaces the butterfly though look!"
*opens the briefcase and a giant demon jumps out*
"so thats where that went..."

*Septim looks at Bjs

"Wow, you're drunk before you even had one drink!"

*Seloc lift the heavy club back off bjs's head.*

"About 5 minutes ago...."