Forums / Roleplaying / Ye Olde Taverne

"I am annoyed by immaturity and stupidity." -_-

[[Yes, come to IRC!!!!!]]

*Opportunity rips off his human disguise to reveal that he is actually very high tech robot.

"You two are gonna pay for that!"

*Roasts Septim with a flame thrower, delivers him to Septim's Exotic Eats, then chases after charley

*As he is running to catch charley, Opportunity feels something stick to his head.

"A magnet?"

*Pulls it off, fearing that it will harm him

"Good thing there's no brain-damage-amage-amage-amage-amage-amage-amage-amage-amage-amage-amage-amage-amage-amage-amage-amage-amage-amage-amage-amage"

*Falls over

*Opportunity rebuilds into Wall-E

"I'm starting to agree with Charley about Onex and Opportunity.  But first I want a whiskey."

[[ORDER:  Whiskry - Be generous :-)]]

*Septim gives Onex a Septim Shot and Opportunity a letter saying that being a robot doesn't give him a tax deduction...

[[ORDER: WHISKEY... NOW!!!]]

"I had five of those once.  No problem, just needed to respawn." :-)

*Opportunity walks in after a weekend with his gf.

"You guys havn't been active in here..."

*Opportunity smacks Arvious with a frying pan

*Septim steals Opportunity's pants.

  "What the hell kind of shoe is that?" *taking out a blade of pure silver dipped in a fine poison he walks briskly to opportunity, who is scrambling to pull up his pants, shoving the blade into his stomach he feels the cloth and skin give way to flesh, Onex presses him against the wall and twists the blade deeper into his body. He steps back, withdrawing the blade and watching his stomach spill liquid onto the dark floor of the bar. Opportunity is to shocked to speak, he gasps for air, from blood loss and from the poison seizing his lungs, and slowly paralyzing his body. He lays dying on the floor, clown shoe in hand, with his pants half on.*

*Onex looked at the dying opportunity and wondered what he was thinking in his last moments* "Steven... Spielburg.." Opportunity groaned as he looked at the ceiling, whoever that was.

[[OOC: He was an actor?!?!?!]]

"Erm, I'll be back in a second."

Arvious walks up to Septim and says, "Hide."  Arvious goes into the room he rented there a million years ago.  Inside, the room was full of weapons.  Arvious grabs a large amount or knifes, an AK-47, a Cobra CA, a Glock Full Auto, and five spiked maces.  For some odd reason, he's able to fit them in his pockets.  Arvious goes to the counter, to see Septim crouched under the corner.  Arvious goes up to the bar, and looks at Onex and Opportunity.

"Shut the hell up, you idi0ts," Arviosu said.  He grabs the Ak-47, and mows their kneecaps until they are just bloody stumps.  He grabs the spiked maces and throws four of them at Onex, pinning him to the wall.  He grabs the last mace and shoves it into Onex's chest.  Arvious grabs the Cobra CA and shoots Onex in the head multiple times.  He then grabs all th4e knifes, and thrwos them at Opportunity.  Opportunity falls back, stuck to the floor, and Arviosu grabs the Glock.  He fires at Opportunity until the body stops moving, and then grabs two grenades that he always carries around.  Arvious stuffs the grenades in the corpses, and ties strings to the pins.  Arvious goes behind the bar, which happens to be grenade proof, and pulls the strings.  The grenades explode, causing smoke to go everywhere.  Arvious looks up from the bar and sees two piles of corpse bits.

Arvious wakes up from his hangover dream, and takes anotehr sip from his whiskey.

"Man, I wish that really happened."

[[Seriously, Onex and Opportunity, shut the hell up.]]

A tall man walks into the tavern.  The lights shine off of steel chainmail armor that is peeking out from underneath his leather archer and his jerkin.  He sat down at the bar, avoiding the damage that was done moments before he entered.  He removed his longsword from his belt so that he could sit on the seat comfortably. 

"Good day barkeep, my name is Sir Charley Deallus.  I would like an ale to warm my bones after my travels."

[[Order: Ale]]

[[This place really went to hell since I left...I cannot let this place die like this]]

*A far younger version of Waldorfius enters the room, a man of around twenty, his hair a dark brown, his eyes emerald green. He walks behind the bar and begins cleaning a glass. He then looks up.
"I am Tiberius Septim the fifth, my friends call me Tiber..." says Septim.

A dark man walks into the tavern, his hood over the eys of his face.  He walks up to the bar, and turns to the bartender.

"Well, I read the directions my father gave me.  Is this Ye Olde Tavern?"

He turns to the man next to him.

"Don't mock other people," the man said.  He grabs something from his pocket.

"I still don't know how my father does that."  Arvious VII points the AK-47 at the patron and fires.

[[ORDER:  Best wine you have]]

Charley Statler was not my father, but in fact my uncle.  King Ernest is my father.  Thank you very much for the drink.

*Drinks his ale while watching the other patrons*

*Opportunity looks up at Tiber Septim IV II.

"That is a very confusing name..."

Prince Tiber Septim IV Report 9/1/2008 11:45:55 PM

"Well, if you're all wondering why I'm the fourth instead of the fifth, my servant messed up my birth certificate...so in fact I am the second Tiber Septim the fourth..."

"Where does it say that?"

Hmm...he is right...it is right next to the "No randomly shooting people with made up weapons." which I do believe Mr. Arvious did fail to follow...

*Opportunity reads the sign and quickly puts away his AK-48