Forums / Roleplaying / Ye Olde Taverne

*Appears from nowhere*

"Greetings newcomers!"

*Pokes Demonsul with a hot poker that he found by the fireplace*

"Someone is being a mister grumpy pants today huh?"

"You have to pay for the drinks he had bought..."

"I am going to sue this crap out of you," replies the patron.

"Hmmm...alright then," mutters Septim, "Before you do though, pay for your drinks!"

*the patron pays for the drinks, and wobbles out the door*

*his family runs in*

"You killed my husband!" yells the wife.

*they run off to get Demonsul imprisoned*

*the first guy's best friend runs in*

"You killed my best friend!"

*runs off to get Demonsul imprisoned*

*opens the door*

"Don't close it, it gets hot..."

*Uses magic to incinerate them to ashes* *Looks around guiltily as he walks away from the scene which he'd made even worse*

*stabs Belmont for his bad spam and throws him out the window before putting up a sign that says "good spam only"*

*Walks in, stabs Belmont in the jugular, walks out*

*Walks in, moves the shield out of the way, jams his sword through Belmont's neck and watches blood spurt out, and walks away*

*Septim walks up and shoots Belmont in the back of the head with a modified Shadeslayer S-21 Spam-Cannon*

*Septim's cuirass blocks the blow and Septim pistol whips Belmont with his spam cannon*

"Obviously you don't know of Septim cloning labs, if so, you would look behind you."

*behind Belmont, several lines of Septim clones are armed with spam muskets. The first line fires, kneels, and begins reloading as the second line fires. The second line kneels and begins reloading as the third line fires. The first line then stands up and restarts the cycle*

*Septim wonders what the hell Nazir is doing as he runs through bushes in a caged area outside the tavern. Septim then shrugs and pulls out a spam rifle. He aims, and fires, striking Nazir in the neck.*

*Septim uses his barkeep powers to kill all of the Kages, along with Nazir.*

"There, now, who wants a drink?"

*Septim pours Charley a Septim Shot, and leans against the wall behind the bar.

i dont know if anyone's noticed....but there are more posts than there are Views!?!?!?!

Truth is weirder than fiction.

There's a saying in Hindi-
"Lato (Kicks) kein bhoot (Ghost) baton (Talk) se nahi(Don't) mantey(Listen)" (Meaning of some words)

Let's see who gets the meaning of that right(rolls eyes). It would be rather apt for Belmont here.

"And how pray did you gain access to that confidential information when Zeta's abode is not even supposed to be on this planet?"

*Laughs after the double post is removed and Demonsul's post makes him look dumb* :p

*Chops off the neck of another patron with a double handed axe*
"Hey you're right, this is fun."

*suddenly, the barkeep falls over, and a new man walks in*

"I am Emperor Gaius Manius Septimus Cidellus, first ruler of the Septim-Cidellian Dynasty of the Septim Empire and heir to Tiberius Septim Cidellus. I know you all don't care about that, as is obvious by Himanil's snoring, however, as the Septim name has ended, I thought you should know. However, I am glad to say that the Septim clones will not be renamed Cidellus clones, it isn't nearly as catchy...goodbye!"

*Cidellus disappears, and the barkeep wakes up, drawing his spam cannon*

"Chicken nuggets!"

*gets up, and looks at the KFC*

"Is that for me, or did you simply decide to poke me with it?"

*flies in the door on his magical wind scooter*

"Me wants some!"

*rips the bucket out of himalnils hands and proceeds to eat all of the dark meat*