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Ye Olde Taverne | ||||
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*Durza wakes from a hell of a long sleep, and walk's to the bar* "I need something to wake me up, man!" | ||||
Apparently our first leader NAPed like every kd on Zeta without telling the vices about them....so every war we have tried to start lately have ended up with us being the bad guys for attempting to break the NAPs that we never knew about..... | ||||
*walks up to Ernie* "Did you tell them that?" | ||||
"SHADE!!!" *Septim stabs Durza in the heart with his longsword. "Sorry, reflex, here's some whiskey." | ||||
*Looks at Arvious between sips* Pretty much.....so far we havnt been labled for anything and some quick reactions have saved us a lot.....but we have so many issues with diplomacy this era.... | ||||
*orders a [[beer]]* "Well, who exactly was the leader that jacked you all?" | ||||
*Septim pours Arvious his beer, then leans against the wall and remembers the first time he walked into the glorious tavern. | ||||
*Durza after a quick trip Ye old Hospital, where he was given a heart transplant, plonks himself at the bar* "Septim you pleb, did i really look like a shade, and im taking that whisky on you" | ||||
"I am not a pleb, I'm a patrician...pleb...you sort of did..." | ||||
*Ernie walks in and sits down at a booth* | ||||
*suddenly, a huge disco ball comes down from the ceiling, and Arvious starts to disco* "Woooooooo! Babe!!!!!!!! Burn babe burn!!!!!!!!!!" *Arvious wakes up from his nap with his head on the table* | ||||
*Septim had put Arvious's hand in warm water when he slept...so Arvious's pants were damp when he woke up. | ||||
"Wow, what a crazy dream! Septim, I'll order [[a whiskey]] please. Wait, what are you guys laighing at?" *looks down at his pants* "How the heck did this happen!?!?!?!" | ||||
*Takes a beer bottle, sticks a rag in the top, lights it, and throws it at a random table* | ||||
*Septim sees Ernie messing with a rag and a bottle. "Did anybody tell him he isn't supposed to douse himself in gasoline too?" *Septim sees Ernie burst into flames... | ||||
"ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.........im on fire!!!! I KNOW!, ill jump into that vat over there!!!, AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! BAD IDEA!" =D
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*sees Ernie jump into an acid pit* | ||||
Arvious didnt get it.....Septim better..... | ||||
*Septim sees Ernie jump into a vat of alcohol. "Ernie, not while you're on fi-too late..." | ||||
hah...Septim got it =p Bring back memories doesnt it? | ||||
*Opportunity walks in and sees ernie burning in the corner. "Oh god... i knew i should've gone to the strip club..." | ||||
Hey welcome to the tavern! Get a drink.... | ||||
*Penny wakes up* | ||||
You shouldnt have that much to drink at once....you should drink MORE | ||||
*Opportunity looks around, the lack of women making him slightly nervous. "Are there any umm... FEMALE bartenders here?" | ||||
"I don't think there ever has been, there have been females in here before...only one I've seen is Erica..." *Suddenly, the door bursts open, Grubby Grubbs walks in. His five o'clock shadow, overshot jaw, and heavy accent apparant. "I'm Grubbs, I've come to renovate...", says Grubbs, he walks around, suddenly a crew of men rush in, two seconds later the bar sports new floorboards, the alcohol isn't dusty, the beer pool is clean, and everything is new. "Goobye'", says Grubbs in his accent before walking off. | ||||
Huzzah! The dart board is fixed! And the pool table has new pool cues =D | ||||
*A very pretty young lady walks in and sits at the counter. Septim then turns to the bar and finds the bottle of Drunk's Demise gone, he walks outside, snipes Grubbs, approaches his mark, grabs the bottle, and walks back, he puts it in the box and locks it again.
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*Opportunity watches as Septim carries around an inflatable girl and sets her down at the bar, admiring her the whole time. "Are we sure that he's ok?" | ||||
*Septim pulls out a needle, pops the girl, and sees her fly around the tavern. "Wow...good call Opportunity, I thought I was kidnapping some chick off the streets to come here..." | ||||
"Jenny!!!" *Opportunity runs around and picks up her remains then sits in the corner with them crying silently. | ||||
*Ernie sits at the bar and wonders* "Why am I here again???" | ||||
"Ernie, you're here because... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...you want to get into a barfight..." *Septim picks up a beer bottle, pays for it, and smashes Opportunity over the head with it, Septim teleports back behind the bar and points to Ernie. "He did it..." | ||||
*Ernie leaves* | ||||
*A large rock troll bouncer with a "I hate Pokemon" shirt blocks the door. "You can't leave...if a barfight has been declared!" | ||||
"Hey I heard that Bertilius Septim sleeps in Pokemon pajamas!" *Points at Septim* And he calls his pet dog Pikachu! | ||||
*Septim eyes the bouncer, and the bouncer laughs before crushing Ernie with his club. "If he's my bouncer, he's not going to smash me..." | ||||
*Luckily Ernie had made a secret hole in the ground to escape before being crushed and then pops back up at his usual barstool...he then buys a bottle of beer and smashes it on Septim's head* "Haha! Funny! Barfight!" | ||||
*Septim's head grows a bump acme style, and steam comes out of Septim's ears. Septim pulls out a toy lightsaber and begins smacking Ernie while making lightsaber noises with his mouth. | ||||
*Ernie pulls out a sword and cuts the lightsaber in half* I would like an [[ALE]] plz | ||||
*Septim, heartbroken by his lightsaber's destruction, pulls out a nerf gun and begins shooting Ernie with it, he uses his other hand to pour Ernie an ale. | ||||
*Opportunity pops in after writing some of his research paper. "WTF? Barfight? who forgot to call me?" *runs around headbutting opponents into the wall | ||||
"Septim picks up a beer bottle, pays for it, and smashes Opportunity over the head with it" You miss that part? | ||||
"He's a liar, he did it!", says Septim as he continues shooting Ernie with his nerf gun. | ||||
*Opportunity pulls out dual tranquilizer guns and shoots Ernie and Septim twice each. "night, night" | ||||
i just realized that i sleep to much to talk to you folks in the Taverne... | ||||
*Ernie wakes up and punches Septim with a Sockem Bopper before downing an ale and passing out again* | ||||
*Opportunity, just to make sure Ernie is not awake, pours some alcohol on his shirt and lights it on fire. | ||||
*Septim gets up. "SOCKEM BOPPERS! SOCKEM BOPPERS!!! More fun than a pillow fight!" *Septim pulls a sockem bopper out of his footlocker and starts punching Ernie with it. | ||||
*Ernie wakes up...good thing he is wearing a fire retardant suit which protects him completely.....he then takes off the suit* "Hey!" *Motions to the large rock troll bouncer* "This guy says he loves pokemon and sleeps with pokemon bedding" *Troll roars and smashes Opportunity* | ||||
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